What do YOU do with anger?
My father was prone to angry outbursts! By that I mean that whether he was feeling humiliated, vulnerable, fearful, powerless, disappointed, anxious, hurt, misunderstood or many other emotions, he was quick to express only anger – loudly, suddenly and aggressively, and always towards others. On first consideration I might conclude this was because my father received standard conditioning that gave the message that anger was one of the few emotions acceptable for males to express. After all, it feels powerful, in control, shouts, ‘pay attention to my issues now!’ and it can railroad situations that might more appropriately require time-consuming, empathetic and delicate attention – possibly attributes more commonly expected of the female arena! (Sorry about the generalisations! Of course I know there are always exceptions!) But it’s also worth considering: it probably does feel easier to experience and express anger outwardly than many other emotions. For example, many years...