Wednesday, 16 December 2009

Brick

I am lightening up today with some silliness!! Please join in.....!
I was once told that thinking up uses for a brick was a way to test people's creativity. So I went home and I had one or two ideas....
• prop up a table that had one leg partially removed by a hamster with a chainsaw strapped on its back
• an imaginary friend for those wishing for an entry in the best of British eccentrics
• the start of a long story about Jack the builder for visual learners
•a chest rest to help you read a hardback book
• to provide a bit of momentum to shove a stiff tap
• a foot pumice
• something that made you feel like you had done a headstand without actually turning yourself upside down
• a pushchair brake
• powdered into a rouge
• a blindfold for a cheat that you didn’t like very much
• a counter for a 'stand in' during a game of twister
• a marker for a blind person to help them find their front door
• a booster for a sandcastle for the kid who got to the beach and had no tools
• a slug killer
• a strike for a match if you need to look cool
• a wall
• a tool to make you appreciate your partner I his/her absence by forcing yourself to share a bed with it
• a potato masher
• a template for another brick
• a theatre prop that was pretending to be an early mobile phone
• an ashtray
• a wrapped-up-as-a-trick expensive present – cos they’re heavy
• a step up to the toilet for a person who is just that little too short like me
• a seat in a place you were forced to camp and you happened to be a pixie
• a Brazil nutcracker
• a book end
• a muscle toner for people who lift things to get muscles
• a weapon to kill people
• a conversation piece for your dining table
• a marble container
• a ‘squash bread up’ so it returns to looking like dough, tool
• a slug home
• the centre piece for a lesson on cuboids
• a weight to make and empty designer bag look like it’s doing something other than just being designer
• a lawn flattener
• a back scratcher
• something that you put in the way of someone carrying 7 cups of tea to make them look a little clumsy
• a balance for a person who has one leg 10 cm longer than the other
• for use in the toss the brick contest in the village fete
• a book mark for people with no subtlety
• a rounders post
• to represent a whole shopping complex on monopoly
• to keep a cinema seat down when you go to the toilet
• to momentarily make kids grateful for the 21st century by using it as an example of all there was to play with back in the good old days
• an artificial limb for anyone who’s been petrified
• a door stopper
• a tin opener for those not fussy about eating off the floor
• a washing – up sponge mangle
• a dual action windscreen de-icer/spare key
• a confident swimmer’s throw and retrieve tool
• a chock
• a small doll’s house roof mould
• for making the sound effect of a brick hitting the ground in a play about two families that lob bricks at each other
• a gimmick for an anger management course – get people to shout at it until they feel foolish and then laugh
• to demonstrate teamwork; one brick can’t do anything – many can make a house
• an ugly paper weight
• for quick popping of bubble wrap
• a hat for an attention seeker
• a question in a volume calculation lesson

5 comments:

  1. Knock you over the head with it so you stop writing silly entries about bricks!!! Ha ha. Love Mrs. Sensible xxx

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  2. very good

    An object of beauty - and expense - at the Tate, as I recall.

    Mark

    PS I left a comment about your excellent post on your father's death but it seems not to have appeared. Never mind - but a very good post.

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  3. Heat it up in the oven, remove, wrap it in a towel and place it in your bed (instead of hot water bottle)
    or
    following the silly line: hollow it out fill with straw and use as a pillow !

    ReplyDelete
  4. I love the dual action windscreen wiper, spare key :) Made me giggle. I couldn't possibly compete with your wonderful list :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Love it!
    Nearly wrote a poem abour bricks then with chicks, sticks, mix, tricks, licks, but that would have been a silly step too far and I don't want to risk brain-brick damage from James.

    ReplyDelete

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